Endings: 2011.

It's the last day of 2011.

Looking back, it hasn't been the worst year, but it hasn't been the best. There definitely were some highlights though.

January: Bringing in the new year in downtown Salt Lake. Making it to the halfway point of my senior year. Winning the awards for "Best Style" and "Staying most calm in a crisis" at the Plato's District Party. Going to the Sundance film festival with my friends from France.

February: Competing in Sterling Scholar, foreign language division and moving on to the finals. Turning 18, on the 18th, and celebrating by going to see Ke$ha.

March: Joining and playing on my mom's women's league soccer team. Going on an amazing prom date for the first and only time in high school. Making the top 15 Sterling Scholar finalists.

April: Going rock climbing for the first time. Going to Bear Lake for spring break and spending the whole time watching old Disney movies on VHS in the loft. Singing in church. 

May: Taking the last AP tests of my life. Spontaneously taking a trip to Moab, sleeping in a land cruiser, and showering in a hostel.

June: Graduating. Going to the Bahamas for my senior trip. Parasailing, swimming with dolphins, and going down the steepest slide at Atlantis.

July: Discovering geocaching. Finding out I passed all my AP tests, even French. Going to REAL games. Spending a night in Cedar for orientation.

August: Working my last shift at Plato's closet. Seeing Hot Chelle Rae, The Summer Set, and We The Kings. Going to the hot air balloon festival. Starting college. Making amazing new friends.

September: Going to St. George and Zions National Park for Labor Day weekend. Seeing Tyler Ward and becoming a true T-bird. Going to Las Vegas for the UNLV football game. 

October: Seeing Yellowcard and Go Radio. Coming home to see my friends get married. Going to the Howl. Having a very interesting and eventful Halloween. 

November: Another trip to St. George for a cute little art's festival. Coming home again for Thanksgiving with the whole family. Going Black Friday shopping. Watching The Muppets movie on a whim in the middle of the night. 

December: Finishing my first semester of college. Going to Temple Square to see the lights with amazing friends. Celebrating a simple Christmas with my family. Seeing old friends and going on fun dates. 

2011 has taught me important lessons, showed me who my true friends are, and will be a year I definitely won't forget. I can't wait to see what 2012 has in store for me. 

Sometimes.

This week. There are so many things I want to say but don't know how to explain, and I don't even know where to start. I'll do my best, so just bear with me.

It's weird because you would think that since it was finals week, it wouldn't have been that great of a week. But it actually was one of the best weeks I can remember having in a while.

I went to the Messiah on Monday night, which definitely started me out on a high note. For the past few years, I have gone to the sing-in performance at Abravanel Hall with my dad and it is one of my favorite Christmas traditions. I was sad that I wouldn't be able to this year because I wouldn't be home. Luckily, Marissa is in the Orchestra of Southern Utah and she informed me that they were doing a free performance of it, so I could go. There is just something about the Messiah. I love it so much.

Fast forward to Thursday, when I got done with finals. I rocked my communications one, and I can only hope the same for my other ones! I got back to Draper that night and went to Temple Square with some friends from school. I absolutely love it when all the lights are up and the candles are floating in the reflection pool. It is so pretty and so humbling.

On Friday I went to the J.Wride Christmas show with Melissa. I don't know if I have said anything about them before but this is one of my favorite bands! Jesse has come to SUU twice but this was the first time that I got to see the whole band together! To put it simply, it was amazing. Plus, my friend Lance's band, littlebigheart, opened for them, and they are wonderful too. So much feeling and humanity in their music. Check both of them out.

Sometimes I have a really strong sense of intuition, or at least that's what I call it. I don't think it is necessarily just that. It's how I make a lot of important decisions. It's the reason that I transferred schools in the first week of my sophomore year of high school, why SUU was the only school I applied to, and why I chose journalism over public relations. Sometimes something makes perfect sense logically, but I just can't do it if my heart isn't in it. It has to feel right.

Anyway, lately I've been having the feeling that there was something I needed to detach myself from. For whatever reason, I needed to leave this piece of me in the past for now. It was a difficult feeling for me to understand because it's not a bad thing. I had been putting it off for a while.

This week, though, I realized that I wasn't the only one feeling this way, and I was able to let go. It is the most freeing feeling. I don't know what the future has in store for me, or why I needed to do this, but in the words of Marilyn Monroe: "I believe everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let them go. Things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they are right.

"Sometimes good things fall apart so that better things can fall together."

Sunday.

It's been a mostly typical Sunday.

I spent the first half of my day looking for my ID card which I lost for the third time this semester (not to mention the time earlier this week when both me and Marissa got locked out). It is the key to my house and my way of obtaining meals. I can't live without that thing. After checking everywhere along the hall, my car, Roberto's, and tearing my room apart, I finally found it outside in the parking lot. I believe in miracles!

The second half of my day was spent listening to French pop and drifting in and out of sleep on my bed while I attempted to do my homework, which I actually did get mostly done! Now all I have left for this week is making a resume, writing a letter of introduction, and studying like crazy for my finals in PR and Geology. Yay. Kill me now.

Once I make it through all of that, though, I can go home for three weeks! I don't know what I'm going to do there, other than Christmas of course, but at least I won't be in school. Maybe someone will take me on a date to Temple Square to see the lights. It's my favorite thing!

Tonight I am probably going to procrastinate everything else I need to do and watch the Virgin Diaries instead. It is just the greatest show ever. Last week I literally almost threw up watching that couple kiss for the first time on their wedding day. I don't even know how they have faces left after that. Seriously.

See you after finals week, friends.



Revision: Literally ten minutes after writing this post, I got locked out of my building again. And then found out Virgin Diaries isn't even on tonight. C'est la vie.

Stop, and take a moment.

I watched a video today that really opened my eyes.

Here it is.

I don't really think I can add much to this, but this boy is amazing to me. He has been bullied for seven years and it has torn him apart. He's terrified to go back to school. But he's going to go back. He is stronger than those words. The thing is, there are so many people that aren't.

Bullying and depression are things that are a very big deal to me. Depression runs in my family, and I spent a while in middle school dealing with it myself. It's not easy.

The bottom line is, people's feelings should not be taken lightly. The things we say and do can affect others in ways we often cannot imagine... for better or worse.