If you've been reading my blog for a while, I'm sure you came to this realization long before I did, but I'm just going to come out and say it. My greatest fear is making decisions and I don't know how to face it.
I mean, I should have figured this out a long time ago, honestly. My entire life, I have either jumped into things without thinking about them or put them off until I was forced to do something. I only applied to one college, for heaven's sake. If that's not a fear of decisions, I don't know what is. And you have patiently read about my antics of changing majors and going on missions and other madness.
Unfortunately, I am nearing time to make one of the bigger decisions of my life so far: graduate school. I've already decided that I'm going, and after much deliberation, decided that I'm going to do student affairs. Just reaching those two conclusions has been awful enough. But obviously, I can't only apply to one school like I could for SUU because I don't have the knowledge that I will get in for sure. I'm panicking and I haven't even applied anywhere yet!
But seriously, even thinking about the whole process of applying and then deciding what to do makes me want to curl up under 20 blankets and never come out. I know it's not that big of a deal and that I'll know what to do when the time comes, but for some reason my body can't process that. I never get stressed out about anything except for this. I need help.
Someone tell me how to get over my fear of decision making without making decisions.
You know, I've had to make a lot of really huge decisions in the past couple of years, and I've learned that it's best to just jump in and hope for the best. Go with your gut feeling and try for something you want with the future in mind. I've had a lot of twists in turns from the choices I've made, but I am happy that I have made every one of them. I guess it really isn't about the choices you make, it's about how you handle the curve balls of life that come with them ;)
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